McDreamy is McLovely

Blicky Kitty and Bernthis both wanted me to expand on my telephone conversation with Patrick Dempsey from Grays Anatomy from my 25 Random things about me.

First of all a little background information - Patrick (as I like to call him now that we are friends), is a huge cycling fan and he has his own Mazda racing team. Anyway he was in the UK filming Maid of Honor, which also co-incided with the start of the Tour of France which 2 years ago started in London. As the company my husband works for sponsor him he asked if there was any chance he could hang out at the start. So my husband and his colleague "Lella" who also happens to be one of my BFF's, got to lounge around one of the pro-team's trailer.

Of course my husband called me to tell me what he was doing, knowing that I am a HUGE Grays fan. I have watched it since day one and I call Lella the day after to discuss the episode from the night before. Lella is used to hanging out with Patrick now - its old hat for her. So this is how the conversation went.

Hubby - "Guess who I am with".
Me - "Who"
Hubby - "McDreamy" (said in a na na na na na type voice)
Me - "What? See I knew I should have come on this trip. What are you talking about?"
Hubby - "Cars"
Me - "Hellllllooooo!!!! - I think you need to be asking him if Meredith and McDreamy are gonna get back together".
Hubby - "Here's Lella"
Lella - "Heeellllllooooo"
Me - "I hate you"
Lella - "Do you want to talk to him"
Me - "NO - What am I going to say to him - I know everything about him he knows nothing about me"
Lella - "Here he is"
Me - "What NO - wait - NO"

In the background I can hear Lella "Patrick - Nic's wife is on the phone can you say Hi?"

ME - "Shit, shit - what the heck am I going to say - think of something - Oh God - whatever it is don't sound like you're a fan - shit - she could have at least prepared me - shit"

Patrick - "Hello"
Me - "Hi - how are you? I am Heather, Nic's wife" (Oh this is so wierd)
Patrick - "Hi"
Me - "Are you enjoying the start of the Tour"
Patrick - some answer I can't remember because I was to busy thinking of the next question but I think it was Yes.
Me - "So what are you doing in the UK"
Patrick - "I have been here for a couple of months filming for a new movie I am making"
Me - "Are you enjoying it? What do you think of the UK?"
Patrick - "I like it, its nice to be out and about and not have the paparazzi following me"
Me - WTF am I going to say now - quick think of something - Oh GOD!
Me - "That's a long time away from the twins did they come with you?"
Patrick - "The family has been here the last month"
Me - "How was flying with them? What are they 4 months now? I am flying to the UK with my little one when he is 9 months."
Patrick - "We flew British Airways and they have little sleepers it was really good" - he then proceeded to tell me all about his flight and the sleepers and how good the little ones were. The whole time I was thinking I bet you flew first class though.
Patrick - "Yep British Airways is the only way to go"
Me - "Thanks for the tip"
...awkward silence
Me - "Well I better let you go - how long have you got left in the UK?"
Patrick - "I go back to the US tomorrow - back to work on Tuesday"
Me - "Another film?"
Patrick - "No Grays"
Me - "Oh good that's my favorite show I watch it every week" - OH MY - Why the hell can you not keep your mouth shut sometimes - you idiot now he knows the truth - I am so embarrassed.
Patrick - "Oh good" with a little giggle.
Me - "Well enjoy the rest of your day"
Patrick - "You too"
Me - "It was nice talking to you" - even if I had no idea what the hell to say to you and I am an adoring fan who is an idiot
Patrick - "You too"

And that was it - of course I had to give Lella the whole breakdown of the conversation like I was at high school.

My impression of him was better than what I expected - he came across as very normal and pretty genuine. But how embarrassing for him to talk to me on the phone knowing nothing about me it was really nice of him to do that.

100th post and a glimpse of my life

This is my life, my loves and your first pictures of me!

Rolfing or Ralphing

This is my 99th post I'll have to think of something special for my 100th.

This week my back has been awful. On Friday I went for physical therapy and the usual massage therapist wasn't there so I saw the "young" guy. He told me that he was going to manipulate me using the 'Rolfing' method. First of all I had never even heard of 'Rolfing' and it reminded me of 'Ralphing' and all I could think of was please don't let it be one of those English versus American spelling differences. Thank God it wasn't apparently just in case you don't know Rolfing is attempting to realign the body structurally and harmonize it in relation to gravity.

I had to lay on my back with my knees bent while he put his hands between my legs and as he said "cupped my cocyx" and then pushed really, really hard on my hip flexors. Besides the incredible pain initially, after what seemed like an eternity you could feel the muscle suddenly relax and the pain would subside. It really was interesting and I did feel better. But let me tell you all I could think of as he was "cupping my cocyx" and pressing on my hips etc. was 'Please Lord don't let me fart'.

Here is the visual!

25 Things you may or may not want to know about me

Rachel from Reservation for 6 tagged me on Facebook and I am posting it here as well. 25 Random Things you may or may not know about me.

1. I love to travel (even with the kids) and visiting new places.
   
2. I am never sure what to say to people when they ask me how many brothers and sisters I have. I have 1 real sister and 1 real brother, 1 half brother, 1 stepsister and 2 stepbrothers one of which passed away. So usually I just say I'm one of three.
3. My favorite alcoholic drink is a grapefruit Woody's only available in the UK.
4. Our wedding dance was "Something Stupid" by Frank and Nancy Sinatra.
5. I love looking at my kids when they are asleep.
6. This week I found out my daughter needs glasses and I am very sad for her, because I hated wearing glasses growing up.
7. I use my dog like a hot water bottle in bed.
8. I prefer showers to baths.
9. I love music from all genres.
10. If I was to start my career from scratch I would work with animals of some sort.
11. I don't eat meat.
12. There are some days when I wonder if I am going to be a stay at home mum for the rest of my life.
13. I am messy - but my mind is organized.
14. I hate feet.
15. I haven't read a book in a long time, I can barely get through a magazine these days and I miss not reading.
16. My favorite food is tortilla chips with salsa and guacamole.
17. I talked to Patrick Dempsey from Grays Anatomy on the phone and had no idea what to say, so ended up talking about traveling and flying with infants.
18. I used to play volleyball competitively and I am only 5'4" - I was setter and couldn't block for the life of me.
19. I can say the longest word in the World it is a town in Wales. Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch This Welsh town actually exists and its name translates as "The church of St. Mary in the hollow of white hazel trees near the rapid whirlpool by St. Tysilio's of the red cave". I think my husband thinks its my party trick as he always makes me say it.
    
20. I can fit my whole fist in my mouth - my sister always tells people this and then wants me to do it.
21. I love Disney movies.
22. I hate thrillers and scary movies as they give me nightmares.
23. My kids were born at the exact same time of day 8.28pm
24. I don't have a middle name
25. I once wanted to be an optician but I am crap at physics.

I am not going to tag anyone specifically but if you read this consider yourself tagged, let me know if you post your 25 things, I would like to check them out.

Have a great weekend.

Links and Things

Want one of these fun pix of yourself or kids, you can upload a picture at http://obamiconme.pastemagazine.com

One of my bloggy friends went offline this week. Psychmama has decided to spend more time with her beautiful Jenna and her hubby. I understand why she is doing it, because blogging is pretty addicting and I myself have cut down the number of posts lately, because of the amount of time it takes me away from my kids. So good luck Psychmama and have fun with your precious family.

One of Psychmama last posts was about networking and she offered Two Ways to Network Your Blog. This sounded interesting - so I thought I'd give it a try. Supposedly these sites increased her traffic exponentially. Anyway - I thought I'd pass on the links.

First she suggested Alphainventions.com. When you first go to the site you will see a blue button that says my blog - it will say enabling, then please wait and then you enter your website.

Then she listed Condron.us. It was easy to submit my blog address and you can see your site appear in the rotation.

I have to say since adding my blog to these sites my stats did go up. Hey there is no harm in trying, huh!

Uncle Bama - the man of our dreams

So today is the day Uncle Bama - yes Molly-Mae still calls him Uncle Bama even though I have told her many times it is Barack Obama - gets the big job. So many people have dreamed of this moment and here it is January 20th, 2009. There seems to be a real buzz in the air and even though I have only been here 10 years I don't recall this buzz when 'W' got in. Maybe its because it should have been Gore. Whatever it is, this man, he has this great charisma that compels you to watch him. The whole world is awaiting - my friends in the UK have emailed me and posted on Facebook that they are watching, truly the World is watching this ray of light. I, like everyone, have a lot of optimism and I truly hope that people will not be disappointed with the length of time it will take for him to change things around.

I love how he feels about his family, the way he jokes with Michelle, and if you haven't read the letter he wrote in Parade magazine to his daughter's you can find it on I left my heart at preschool. It gave me goosebumps.

Last night as I was laying in bed I was thinking what I would do if I was president for a day and could get anything passed. Here are some of my thoughts.

1. Healthcare free - for everyone. I would rather pay a little more taxes and have no worries about healthcare as long as it remained good healthcare. Think about it if you paid what you pay to insurance companies towards socialized medicine wouldn't you rather do that than worry about you and your loved ones long term health care.
   
2. Education - More money needs to go into schools - even if you're not a parent we all know that, plus the day needs to be longer. I was a teacher in the UK and our day went till 3.30. At least that gives working parents a chance. (Sorry Vodka mom you're probably spitting at your monitor now).
3. Lets not bring our soldiers home and forget about them. I have read that the IRAQ war has given us the highest amount of amputees than any other war. These men and women need to be cared for like they were caring for us.
4. I would make sure that criminals convicted with rape and sexual molestation were given longer sentences. I think prison should be hard time not a chance for them to earn degrees, watch tv, truly they should not want to go back. Isn't it true that many offenders re-offend.
5. Stop the Breed Specific Legislation. If you don't know what this is - certain states in the US ban specific breeds of dogs. Each case should be individual as each human is individual.
6. Put a cap on the price of Formula for newborns, yes I am talking about the $25 a tin of Nestle Good Start the only formula my daughter would take.
7. Many of us are going paperless so why the heck are they still chopping trees at a rapid rate of knots. For every tree chopped another needs to be planted.
   
8. Encourage Solar - the price of solar panels are way to high for many people to afford.
9. Allow marriage between 2 people with no regard to sex.
10. Not spend $150 million on an inauguration when we are in a recession. (This is the only thing that has made me bummed about today). Couldn't we celebrate with a cupcake and some champagne or even American sparkling wine (read Marinka's post)!

Of course I would have no idea how this would be paid for, but these are my wishes for this wonderful man that will take the pledge for us today. Right, I am off to go and celebrate with my cupcake.

Injections - My kid didn't know what was coming!

As a parent, you would do anything, anything to protect your child and make them feel safe. Except for me the one thing I wouldn't do, is take injections for them. I look at a needle and go green. I have been better since having kids but it started when I had to have an injection in the cervix about 12 years ago. The Dr was watching the procedure on TV so that he could guide the needle to the right place. For some complete bizarre reason unkown to me, I asked him "if that was me" as I pointed to the monitor. Am I stupid - Who the f**k would it be? All I can say was I was nervous and word crap started pouring out of my mouth. So the Doc said "Yep that's you", and what did I do - start to faint! I had the whole slapping of the face thing by the nurse "stay with us" she cried.

I had more injections when I went through the green card process. The lovely Dr we had to see had Parkinsons and I was in a major panic that this guy was going to give me the injections. Seriously I was wide eyed, heart racing at the thought of this man putting injections in my arm. Thankfully at the end of the medical exam he told us his nurse would be giving us the injections and made a joke "you wouldn't want me to do it would you", I let out a nervous giggle and a sigh of relief.

My next injection was for an IV when I had my ectopic pregnancy. It was morphine before I went into surgery. Lets just say I was in so much pain they could have given me 20 injections and I wouldn't have bat an eyelid. The morphine was fantastic - I could see why people get addicted.

Then along came the little ones. Those of you who are mums know you just don't care what they do as long as your child comes out safely. But with both my kids I had "Ivor" the friendly IV machine that came with me everywhere, including the shower.

So now we get to my own kids. When they were babies and had their vaccinations, I couldn't look at the needles and afterwards I immediately breast fed or gave them a bottle straight away and both of them did really well. Now my daughter is 4 and went for her wellness check. She had the option of having her vaccinations this week or waiting till next year. I had bribed her, if she was good at the Dr's office I would give her the chocolate Santa that was left over from Christmas. I asked her what she wanted to do and she said she would have the injections. My Dr laughed, saying he had never heard that before and I told him her eye was on the prize. We waited for the nurse. Now usually when she is having 4 - yep I did say 4 injections they get 2 nurses and put 2 injections in each leg at the same time. Nope! Not this time. Just one nurse and she was a throwback from Attila the Hun. My daughter had to endure 1 injection after the other, screaming at the top of her voice and wriggling like a wet eel. Let me just say I would have done anything at that moment to have had those injections for her. Fortunately the prize of the chocolate Santa and the lure of the Dr's treasure chest full of useless $1 toys saved the day.

Lets just say my husband is going to my son's 4 year appointment.

Fear its not what you expect

I don't know about you but I could not take my eyes away from the TV today until I found out that everyone had managed to get out of the US Airways Airbus that went down in the Hudson River.

I think I have some sort of morbid fascination with crisis situations. As soon as I heard the NBC music and then the announcement of Brian Williams "this is a special report" I shot into the living room to check out what has happened. I was glued. My kids would ask me a question and I would fob them off with some sort of answer until eventually I stuck Playhousedisney.com on my laptop. Even though NBC kept showing some of the same video over and over of the rescue boat with all those passengers in it and some of them on the wing, I still couldn't avert my eyes.

I don't rubberneck or at least try not to on the road if there is an accident but there is something different about watching it on TV. For 9/11 I think I did not move from the TV for 3 days. In the end my husband made me. The Tsunami in 2004, we had only been home with my first born for 2 days and I hadn't put on the TV, so when I eventually did I watched those waves over and over! As for Hurricane Katrina - I was a little obsessed, even I will agree with that. I would flip the channels to see what was going on at ABC or FOX. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME!

I think I so desperately wanted everyone to survive and can't believe the horror of these particular situations. I wonder what I would do in these situations, when you are suddenly faced with fear, how would I react. I know the last time when I encountered true fear I didn't react the way I thought I would. I was camping in Lake Tahoe and a juvenile bear came into the camp, we made a load of noise and it left only to return in the middle of the night. I could hear it sniffing on the other side of my tent. A thin piece of nylon separating us. I FROZE! My heart was racing and yet I couldn't move. I tried to open my mouth to tell my husband but it was like my teeth were wired together. For what seemed like an eternity I tried to do something and eventually my dog Macy woke up and barked. Thankfully this jolted me out of my igloo enough to tell my husband and make a load of noise. Fear its a weird sensation and one I don't recommend.

I am so glad that the pilot managed to make that landing so that everyone could get out. Thank goodness for those life vests that were under the seat I always wonder if they really are under the seat and whether I would have time to put it over my head - thread the belt through the loop and tie it at the front and then pull to inflate or blow to inflate. Apparently you do have time!

I am giving a great shout out to the amazing pilot that saved all those people and thank goodness for all those ferries that got there so quickly. Man - New York has had a tough few years.

Sex Ed could it be any more embarrassing

When I was teaching I had to teach sex education. I was 26 at the time I started teaching this, and half the time I felt like I was still a kid myself. I remember my first time teaching this class, I was so red in the cheeks and so hot under the collar. Of course my 15 year old kids were trying to ask me as many questions as possible to embarrass me and it worked. As the year went on nothing they could ask me embarrassed me, I heard it all and of course I had to answer in the most politically correct way I could.

I related my first time teaching sex ed to a colleague of mine and he told me about his "virgin" sex ed class. He thought it would be best to get all the embarrassing words out of the way and asked the kids to think of all the slang words for their girly and boy parts. He wrote them all on a white board with the plan to not have to repeat them, once they are on the board and only use the official words. I thought that was a great idea until he told me he didn't realize he had written them on the board with permanent ink! FANTASTIC!

He had to lock the room during recess to find the caretaker to get something to wipe the board with.

He was my hero!

Sheep Poop too!

Yes this sheep is pooping. Apparently sheep poop is fascinating. Why does it come out in perfectly round little poop beads.

Uncle Bama - what a great week

I have to tell you some of the great things that have happened since I last posted.

• During the whole election campaign I would ask my kids to be quiet so I could listen to Obama's speeches. When he won I explained to my daughter that Barrack Obama would be the new president and trying to explain to a 3 year old what a president is, is quite difficult. The easiest way to do it was to say he was like our King. The other day the President Elect was on TV and my daughter literally was jumping up and down shouting at the top of her voice "mummy, mummy it's Uncle Bama".

See don't they look alike, he could easily be her uncle.

• My husband is "working" this week in Mallorca (an island off of the Spanish coast) , I say "working" because really his work involves him hanging out with World Class Athletes and schmoozing with journalists. He says its Public Relations but I like to call it schmoozing. Anyway, I was looking forward to having the bed to myself, getting to read magazines and just generally be a slob! The very first morning I woke up like this :-

Slowly 1 by 1 they all entered the bed until I was hanging off the bed in the morning. And just in case you think it was a drawing mistake the dogs were under the covers!!!

• My 2 year old son said to me "mummy that's a pretty top" - this boy is going to charm the socks off girls when he is older. Previously I told you he had a condition called Nystagmus, which makes his eyes shake and he tilts his head to focus - I was very proud to see Frank Lagella nominated for a Golden Globe last night for his role as President Nixon. Why? I hear you ask. Frank also has nystagmus - so anything is possible.

• My daughter rode her bike without training wheels - woo hoo!

• I received a golden keyboard award from Braja at Lost and Found in India this week on my comment on the cows butt - I just wish I was as flexible as this cow. I first started blogging in August after a friend introduced me too it. You read a blog, you read the comments, and then you look at the blog of the person who posted the comment, and before long you are in the spiderweb of the blog world. Some of these people have offered me a lot of support, and I feel that they have become my friends. I have learnt there are people going through the same things as I am, all around the World. Some of my blog friends, actually most of them make me laugh out loud, some have made me cry, some have made me learn new words and some are just supporters. My favorite bloggy friends - are on the sidebar for more reading.
  

Does Urine make a great conditioner?

How many times have I told you that I hate potty training?

Today I had to take a long shower to help my back. I had physical therapy and I felt so worked afterwards, I thought the shower might help. I washed my hair and stayed in the shower for about 30 minutes, I am normally a little more eco friendly in my showers but today was an exception.

Anyway after getting out of the shower I felt a little chilly, I got dressed but still felt cold, so I decided to start the wood burning stove to heat up the house.

My 2 year old who has been doing the potty training thing, went into the bathroom to pee. Its a huge celebration when he pees or poops on the potty. As I was to busy setting up the fire, I foolishly ignored his jubilations at peeing on the potty. So guess what? He brought the potty out to me, shoved it in front of my face to show me and managed to pour some god damn urine on my washed hair - eeeeeewwwwwwww! I HATE POTTY TRAINING!

How to steal a penguin

This is an absolutely true story and as it happened over 30 years ago - I think the statute of limitations are up. However I am not responsible for anyone who goes out and steals a penguin after reading this post and I don't recommend it either.

I used to work as a teacher in a high school. One of the science teachers was a very quiet, shy, demure lady, who was super sweet and the kids always run her ragged. One day we were talking about field trips and she told me, when she was a teenager, she stole a penguin from one of the largest zoo's in the UK, (no names mentioned but it was in London and probably the only one in London). When I pulled myself back up to my seat, because I did fall off my seat thinking this is one of the quietest, sweetest of friends and "SHE stole a penguin", she told me her story.

She was in her mid teens and had been at the zoo all day. She had a real fascination with the penguins and thought that they would make a really good pet. (Obviously she hadn't smelt penguin poop, not that I smell penguin poop regularly but have done in the past at the aquarium). Anyway she lured the unsuspecting penguin to the edge of its enclosure with a tuna sandwich. Yep! Tuna sandwiches are all you need! She reached down grabbed the little fella and shoved him in her backpack. She managed to get out of the zoo without any problem and onto the school bus to take her home. She sat at the back of the bus and all the kids piled back on. After they had been gone about half an hour, she opened her backpack to check on him, thankfully the penguin was still alive. With one little wiggle the penguin hopped out of the backpack and started waddling up the aisle of the bus. "BUSTED". However, all the other kids thought this was fabulous and my friend became a school sensation.

The bus had to turn back and the teacher took her and the penguin back to the zoo. Fortunately in those days she just got a telling off from the zoo but she did get suspended from the school. Let me just tell you I laughed my ass off when she was telling me, I could not picture her stealing anything let alone a penguin. I guess its the quiet ones you have to look out for. (Talking of which thanks to everyone who commented on my last post on pervert paranoia).

I have been to the zoo since and you would not be able to poach the penguins these days, as they have changed the enclosure. However, if you go to any zoo I suggest you take a tuna sandwich, you never know when you might need one!

I have Pervert Paranoia - please help me

I was going to write a post on how to steal a penguin as my first post of the year but I am going to have to leave that to later this week as I am in a complete tizzy!

Today my daughter was holding the hand of her granny when a young man in his early 20's I would guess, who was sitting down with about 6 others, got up grabbed my 4 year old daughters hand and said to her "you're a pretty little girl aren't you". Both Molly-Mae and her granny kept on walking.

I talked to Molly-Mae about it after and told her I didn't want anyone we didn't know to hold her hand, or grab her, as we don't know who they are. Her answer to this was "I think he was a nice man mummy". A huge shiver went down my spine as I tried to tell her, that although some people appear nice they can be not so friendly and could take her. I stressed to her that I wanted her to shout at the top of her voice "mummy" when someone touches her. I know this guy could have been nice but I am totally and utterly creeped out. This is not the first time something like this has happened to her. Another time, Molly-Mae had trapped her finger in a doorway and some complete random stranger said to her as if I was invisible "would you like me to drive you in my car to the hospital".

I just don't know what to do, I feel there is a fine line with scaring the crap out of her and keeping her the friendly little girl that she is. Molly-Mae is a beautiful little girl, as you can see from this recent post of her on her birthday. Even before this incident I looked at everyone who makes a comment about her like they are some sort of crazy nutcase, and are going to run off with her. I know that most people are truly genuine, but that momma bear feeling in me is so overwhelming, and I truly am not sure where to go with Molly-Mae in terms of stranger danger. So please anyone if you have any advice, please give it to me before I start becoming a crazy person with pervert paranoia.