Stop the PP

Warning this post contains content that will affect germophobes.

My husband, who I love dearly, has one very strange habit he is a PP. What is a PP I hear you ask? He is a power pee-er. Yes, his pee comes out of him so fast and hard that it has been known to wake our children in the next room. Why he has to pee so loudly and so quickly I am not sure, but he does.

Last night as I was cleaning my teeth, my husband came into the bathroom, lifted up the seat and as I put my hand to my ears, out came the Niagra falls. His pee hit the water so hard, it failed to break the surface tension properly and bounced out and hit my bare foot - eeeewwwwww! Now I can cope with my kids pee, poop and vomit on me but for some reason I can't cope with my husbands. How on earth can he not manage to get his pee into a 12" x 10" hole (I measured it this morning). Seriously! The worst thing about this whole incident is - how many times before as he splattered our bathroom floor with his power pee! I bet a giraffe could manage to get its pee into a hole that big - but not my husband.

So I am vowing now - Charlie is going to learn to pee with manners.
1. He is going to pee quietly
2. He is going to always put the seat down afterwards
3. He is going to dab with toilet paper, so that he doesn't have wet marks on his underwear.
4. He is always going to wash his hands.

I call to mum's and women everywhere - STOP THE POWER PEE-ERS